testing

chatty cathy asian eighth grader

taking her placement test

who, during the break, informed me all about her figure skating career

who, during the math test, had to ask me what a can of tuna looks like

who, at the end, asked permission to make her math scratch paper into origami

you go right ahead 

high five

1.  things fall apart; the centre cannot hold; mere anarchy is loosed upon the world; whatever, i'm going dancing.  went saturday.  danced a little last night.  would again if i could again.  i dare say it is impossible to be overwhelmed or unhappy while dancing.  you just wiggle it all away.  and on that note,  i REALLY want to work for myself sometime in the not too distant future so that i can maybe sleep in a little after my 31 year old body wiggles past midnight.

2.  i think Don't Trust the B... in Apt 23 is so great.  just really so great.

3.  saw "her" again.  laughed and cried still... sometimes my eyes welled up at just how beautiful the shots were.  that movie makes me want to take photos.

4.  last night james and lauren gifted me with a DELICIOSO jar of spicy pickles that i set on the passenger seat floor of my car while i went to j's holiday work party.  when i returned in a heavily alcohol and karaoke state of 3 a.m. giddiness, my mind spun.  i reached down to pick up the jar and realized that the juice had a leaked out.  I prepared for full panic mode, but was SHOCKED and OVERJOYED to find that the jar had been perfectly resting on a smushed box of kleenex, which had absorbed nearly all the pickle juice.  praise ye, pickled gods.  praise ye.

5.  not sure.

down low
too slow

iphone treasure trove

Camp Patton following little ol' ME?  day = made 

i am not a mother and i am not catholic, but i just LOVE grace and her family and her writing voice.  i snortle at Conversations with Julia and Julia Styles every single time. 

They just couldn't justify springing for the whole roll of border?  Is this evidence of the tight budget?  A faculty room mystery.

true dat (remember when people used to say that?  it's uncomfortable).

another faculty room mystery.  this little gem showed up after christmas break on the give-away/free table in a package.  no takers.  today i took it out of the box to inspect it a little more closely.  it makes my brain hurt so bad.  i just really don't understand.

make up

once upon a time
(last night)
i took a shower and then put on makeup and then got ready for bed.
j subtly made fun of me for putting makeup on 20 seconds before going to sleep
and i sputtered out some asinine reason about how i look crazy without makeup because my hair is dark yaddyaddyyaddydeerinheadlights reaction.
and then i thought a little bit about how ABSURD that little habit of mine is.  to think that without eyeliner i am off-putting and hard to look at.  to think that i am monstrous without an eyebrow pencil.  when did that start?  i know that in the last few years, i've been loving discovering the transforming power of makeup (only fifteen years later, right?), but when did that become this ugly story i tell myself about how without it, i am no longer my best me?

and then i wiped off my eyes and went to bed
and woke up and didn't put any on
and i'm still goddamn beautiful.

the end.

a few words

1.  back to work tomorrow (quiet falling NOOOOooooooo......) but allah knows the structure might be just what i need.   whenever i go back, i shock myself at how incredibly productive i can be.  on work days, i accomplish more before 10 a.m. than a whole 3 days of break.  life seems to operate at a faster productivity rate, but a MUCH slower this-is-your-life-wasting-away-while-you-are-having-to-be-here kind of pace.  maybe someday i'll be able to peace-out to my teaching career.  not convinced i'll miss it.

1a.  omg, i've forgotten 84% of my students' names.
2.  i watched one episode of House of Cards, so goodbye to the next week of nighttime hours.  I see it as a very awesome and welcome distraction from the fact that the next MadMen season doesn't come out on netflix until April.  I REALLY NEED TO KNOW how things are going to go there.

3.  it may be time to start noticing and start being noticed soon.  what a world of signals and cues we navigate on the day to day.

4.  the way groups of school kids all act in unison.  drove by a few groups of middle schoolers earlier sitting in a clump of crisscross applesauce in identical phys ed outfits.  they were all just a collective... nobody... from that vantage point.  but inside the minds of each one of them, so much is being worked out.  hunger levels and distractions and anger issues and why doesn't he like me? quanderies.  and then just now, a whole massive herd of elementary kids across the street just drained back into the building after recess like water down a drain after dishes.  no one struggled away.  no one was left.  everyone knew that the place to be was in that crowd and moving with them.  odd.  collectives.  walking in a group.

5.  it is january and i am wearing flipflops and i am sorry, michigan, but i think that it's really over.  i can't imagine working out winter depression in mandatory hibernation mode.  i just can't.  i think i would become an unhealthy and sad version of myself.

6.  remember when i used to judge women so fiercely for wearing yoga type black pants in public?  not that they were too casual, but because they were just so... revealing?  well f'all if i couldn't live and die happily in them.  times, they are a'changin.

7.  that first slow drink of a fresh cup of coffee is so f'ing sexy.  i was trying to find a better word for it, but i'm not convinced there is one.

8.  robots robots robots

a few from the iphone treasury

 
photograph of a photograph.  bang.

bff venting her inner turmoil after finding out that i *gasp* smoked

 i waver so violently between thinking i'm awesome and being embarrassed about my whole existence.

 universe provides context

the very best head butt buddies.  this is sherman in EXTREME HAPPINESS mode.

and i hope you do.

2014

i'm not there yet.