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Showing posts from March, 2020

fear and disappointment

Things That People Buy When Preparing For The Worst: toilet paper.  all of it. cleaning supplies.  all but the organic shit. pancake mix. spaghetti fixings. frozen pizza. I wander from room to room and refresh my newsfeed every few minutes. Several times a day I feel a huge swelling of sadness for the world,  I feel it in my chest and my eyes.  Little hellos of despair.  But the weight of it doesn't stay.  Yet. Yesterday I encountered my upstairs neighbors at the grocery store where they loudly told me that this was all a conspiracy.  The "real" truth was that this was a way for the governments of the world to control their people. The horror I felt then and the rage that followed when they sent me youtube links might be the worst pangs of despair yet. I am so disappointed in humanity. I don't know what I need in all this. Very little, I think I'll learn soon enough. We are all petulant children in the backseat asking "are we there...